What is a Muslim? It depends on your sources. Book and scholarly definitions paint one picture. The behavior of Muslims gives an entirely different one.
The act of becoming a Muslim is relatively simple. One must believe and proclaim that there is no god but God and that Muhammad is the Messenger of God. Nevertheless, like getting married--where the simple statement “I do” or being pronounced “husband and wife” inaugurates marriage--being married or being a Muslim is far more involved and complex than the action of becoming so.
A dictionary search will tell you that a Muslim is a believer in or adherent of Islam. A slightly more in-depth investigation will yield the Arabic root meaning of Muslim as one who surrenders (to the Will of God). Islam itself is defined as a full and willing surrender to God, and sometimes more completely as to make or attain peace or to be complete. These dictionary meanings are entirely accurate, yet somehow vague. After all, what does it mean to submit oneself to God or to attain peace?
The following are some ways in which the meaning of “Muslim” is given in the Qur'an.
God said: "For Muslim men and women, for believing men and women, for devout men and women, for true men and women, for men and women who are patient and constant, for men and women who humble themselves, for men and women who give in Charity, for men and women who fast (and deny themselves), for men and women who guard their chastity, and for men and women who engage much in God's praise, for them has God prepared forgiveness and great reward. ... (Chapter 33, Verse 35)When his Lord said to him [Abraham], "Be a Muslim," he [Abraham] said: "I submit myself to the Lord of the worlds." (Chapter 2, Verse 131)
Abraham said: "Our Lord! make of us (Abraham and Ishmael) Muslims, bowing to Thy will ... (Chapter 2, Verse 128)
Joseph said: "... O Thou Creator of the heavens and the earth! Thou art my Protector in this world and in the Hereafter. Take Thou my soul (at death) as one submitting to Thy will (as a Muslim), and unite me with the righteous." (Chapter 12, Verse 101)
Also, Muhammad taught that a Muslim is one from whose hand and tongue the Muslims are safe (Sahih Bukhari).
The above provide a fairly comprehensive definition and description of a Muslim:
A Muslim is one who submits his or her own will to the Will of God. In addition to believing in God, Muhammad and the message of Islam, a Muslim is devout, truthful, patient, constant, humble, charitable, self-denying, chaste, and ever praiseful of God. Finally, a Muslim is a person who does not abuse others, either physically or verbally, particularly other Muslims.
But there seems to be a new, emerging definition of Muslim that is not encompassed by the above. In fact, in many ways, it runs counter to everything a Muslim should be. A cynical definition of a “professional” has been around for years. It states that a professional is someone who doesn’t complain when treated unprofessionally. A new, similar definition of Muslim appears to have come about. It is now understood that a Muslim is expected to not complain about or criticize another Muslim who behaves un-Islamically. One who does so should be prepared to have his or her status as a Muslim, at least as a true Muslim or a good Muslim, challenged. Incidentally, Arabic has several words that translate into uncommon English terms such as mischief-maker, hypocrite, heretic, apostate, evil-doer, one who has gone astray, and so on. The Arabic words carry heavy religious undertones that are not necessarily present in the English, so we’ll stick with “bad Muslim” for the time being.
We find this twisted definition in action throughout the Muslim world. Forget about the leaders of Muslim countries, for they belong to a different domain altogether. Consider this definition at the level of family, neighbors, friends, and co-workers. If your parents, grandparents, siblings, or anyone else whom you should respect abuses you verbally, emotionally, or physically, it is best to remain quiet. You should not object, protest, or complain. You dare not fight back for fear of being disobedient and justifying further abuse from other family members. If your brother borrows money and doesn’t pay you back, don’t ask him for it; that would be humiliating. If he asks to borrow money again, don’t say no; that would be selfish. If your sister comes into your house while you’re away, takes food from your refrigerator, and then complains to everyone that it was the cheap brand, never ask her why she entered your house or took food without permission in the first place. That would be the same as calling her a thief. And if your nephew borrows your computer and leaves pornography on your hard drive, don’t ask him or his parents about it. You might as well accuse him of rape. You would most certainly be labeled as a bad Muslim if you did any of these things.
If your neighbor violates your rights by stealing from you or creating some problem, you must never complain to him or her. After all, what right do you have to speak to your neighbors that way? If your neighbor’s children misbehave in any way, you should not correct them, no matter how serious their behavior has been nor how politely you do it. If you speak directly to the parents, you might as well be accusing them of being bad people and their children criminals. And even though you can’t speak with your neighbors directly, you should never turn to other neighbors or friends to help solve the problem. That amounts to backbiting and gossip, which are major sins. And never go to local authorities about anything he does. This would be exposing him to those who would oppress him, which makes you an oppressor, which is a sin. If he wants to burn tires in the middle of your yard, that’s his business. If his son wants to practice engraving on your car, so what? If his wife wants to slap your children around for not letting her children take their toys away and break them, you’d better not intervene. That would make you a bad Muslim.
School teachers should never catch students cheating, because that would lead to serious consequences. Imagine the shame of the child or university student who gets expelled for academic misconduct. Could you live with yourself knowing that somebody didn’t pass because you actually applied the rules? More important, could you handle the never-ending flow of telephone calls from angry parents and relatives accusing you of being unjust? If you are a police officer, be sure to never issue a citation to or arrest a fellow Muslim. That would be an abuse of your power, even if he drove speeding through a red light and ran over a few dozen innocent people. Managers should not give poor performance reviews to chronically absent employees who never meet deadlines and talk on the phone all day. That would be taking away their due portion. You would be a bad Muslim.
And don’t forget your brothers and sisters at the mosque, for they are likely to be the strongest proponents of the new definition of Muslim. Start with the parking lot at Friday prayer. If the building were to catch on fire, the Fire Department wouldn’t be able to bring their trucks within three miles because thousands of people believe it is their God-given right to park in the first row no matter what time they arrive. Mosque administration should not advise others of how or where to park, for they have no Divine authority to do so. When you enter the mosque, don’t remove others’ shoes from behind the door so that you and others can enter. Never mind the shoe racks. They’re there for decoration and mustn’t be dirtied. If you need to make ablution before prayer, pay no attention to those who put more water on the toilets and floors than on their own bodies. And even though you and countless others have slipped on the floor, perhaps sustaining serious injury, please don’t request that the mosque administration do anything to improve the situation. You’ll only branded as one who is critical of the management. Whatever you do, never volunteer to pay for, organize, or otherwise work towards a solution on your own. That can only mean that you are challenging the authority of the mosque administration, a very dangerous and divisive community standing indeed. That would make you a bad Muslim.
If others bring their children to the mosque, don’t expect the children to be quiet or behave. They should run, scream, cry, fight, break, rip, tear, and defile anything they wish. The mere mention to anyone about unruly children in the mosque signifies your apparent desire to turn them away from Islam, which is tantamount to delivering them directly into the hands of Satan and the Fires of Hell. Dinners and other events at the mosque are meant for community members who seldom attend; you’ll recognize them as the ones you don’t recognize. Even if the food is limited, don’t advise anyone to leave enough food for others, and don’t expect anybody to stay to clean up afterwards. What do you think they are? Servants? Don’t mind the wasted food left all over the place. Only a spy or a critic would notice such things.
If you attend a small or large meeting, be sure to agree with every other person’s opinion. You don’t know nearly as much about anything as anyone else, whether the topic is Islam, medicine, marriage, banking, education, construction, politics, Arabic, English, or planting date palms. Your being a Muslim scholar, surgeon, husband or wife of 40 years, banker, teacher, building contractor, congressman, professor of Arabic or English, or farmer has nothing to do with it. However, your ability to shout, pound your fists, and stubbornly stick to any position will buy you some credibility with others. If you leave the meeting or quit the committee, though, you will be labeled as a bad Muslim.
When you leave the mosque, especially after Friday prayer, notice how everybody wants to be the first to get out of there. You should not complain to or about those who double- and triple-park behind your car; that would earn you the title of trouble-maker. Bottle-necked traffic remains at a stand-still, but you shouldn’t mind if your brothers (and some sisters) leave the line of cars behind you and make their own exit across the mosque lawn only to cut back in front of you at the point where you finally make it to the road. Multiply all this by one hundred on the two days of Eid. Any Muslim who has volunteered to facilitate the flow of traffic will be considered a control freak or an abuser of his authority. Such people will be laughingly ignored, cursed, and even spat at for intentionally slowing down the traffic in order to allow his friends to exit first. On the other hand, if local police or a private security company are contracted to take on this role, people will comply with their directives. Nevertheless, in this case, the mosque leadership will be accused of handing control of Muslim affairs over to non-Muslims. This is further proof that our leaders are, in fact, very bad Muslims.
Indeed, we Muslims find ourselves in a very odd situation today. On one hand, we read or hear the lofty definition of a Muslim as a pious and self-denying believer in God, His Messenger, and His Message. On the other hand, we are selfishly judged by our peers with suspicion. They fear that we are trying to prevent them from having whatever they want, when we are often simply trying to do the right thing in the best way we know how. What frequently happens, though, is a fight to protect our own rights or the rights of others from the misdeeds of other Muslims. Upon doing so, we are instantly tagged as bad Muslims.
Finally, Muhammad taught:
If one of you sees (something) bad, he should change it with his hand; and if he is not capable of that, then with his tongue; and if he is not capable of that, then (he should detest) it with his heart; and that is the weakest faith. (Sahih Muslim)
Given all that we know from the Qur'an, Hadith, and even dictionary definitions, we must not allow the new definition of Muslim to become the status quo in our society today. It is the root of many of the problems we currently face and it engenders the backwardness that has come to characterize us. In the end, it is not the fault of Israel, America, or former colonial powers. It is the responsibility of each and every one of us to live up to the lofty standards by which we evaluate one another. Non-Muslims may not like us for it; other Muslims certainly won't. In the end, however, these are the standards by which God judges us all.